A Gift Remembered

Having Eric home with us lately has been more than good.  My mother's heart is full.

We've talked about so many things these last several weeks.  Then, one day our conversation turned and took me by surprise.  Eric said he hadn't heard me play the piano since he's been home.

Sitting across from him, a lump caught in my throat and something tugged at my soul.  I said, "Oh, I haven't played in quite some time .... not since...well, things have changed."

He said, "I always liked hearing you play."  Now, this was a surprise!  "Really?" I don't remember him ever telling me before.  He went on to say it brought a comfort to the house when I would sit at the piano while he was doing school, or drawing, or just being at home.

Eric grinned - his eyes twinkled.  "You should play, Mom....now."  I laughed as I struggled to keep the tears from spilling over.  "Really?"


I'm not an accomplished pianist.  I'm one who enjoys my own private concerts of reflection and worship.  I once relished the times from sitting at those keys....and....just....play.  It's been awhile.

Playing the piano came fairly natural to me.  There were family get-togethers while growing up.  Fiddles, guitars, banjos, piano.  I learned to read music pretty much on my own - with a few helpful hints from my dad and uncle.  My cousins and I would take turns playing the keys while others sang over our shoulder.  It was great fun.

This grew into my teen years where I spent hours at home after school - relaxing at the keyboard. My mom told me she missed this after I moved away.  I know - I feel the same about my own daughter no longer playing in our home.

There were times I would accompany the youth choirs and soloists.  Later, as an adult, I would help out with various worship services and the like.  I enjoyed it for a time, but began to lose the confidence I had while young.  Somehow I began comparing myself with those 'better', or making too many mistakes...or...or.....  My joy turned to sorrow and serious inadequacy.  The fulfillment of worship was affected  and I withdrew from music altogether.  My piano now stands in our living room - quiet.

Eric's sweet question to me is a wake up call.  A unique gift - to me - to worship.  Sweet worship through the keys of my piano.  Long ago tunes bring tears of remembrance.  Release of the day's tensions and encouragement of hope.

It has been said, Music engages the soul.  I believe it.  I need it.  Eric's words have touched me to my core.  God's gift.